what your lamp choice says about you as a person
if these lamps could talk.
Published Sep 29, 2015 5:00 AM
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Not to make light of things, but there are too many lamps. It can be difficult to narrow down “the one” that you really take a shine to. Here, we explore a variety of lamps, each one so individual and important that it can’t help but illuminate certain aspects of your glowing, unique personality. To find out what your taste in lamps says about you, read on.
You host book club.
An avid reader, you like to surround yourself with conversational decor likely to inspire thoughts and discussions of adventures afar. This thoughtful piece evokes imagery of a ship returning from the high seas. It lives in your reading nook to brighten the pages of your literary delights. It’s also good for pointing toward the backyard when you can’t find the dog.
The amateur film critic
A life spent screenside is exposed to a plethora of set dressings and decor finds, so many that one or two can’t help but creep into your home. You, with laptop charged, use this steampunk-inspired option to see the subtitles of your French post-war period piece clearly. Then you blog about it.
You don’t fear commitment.
A striking statement piece that’s impossible to miss, this lamp belongs to someone who knows what she wants, gets it, and keeps it. This lamp is here. This lamp is proud. This lamp is not going to a consignment store when you move in with your boyfriend. He can put his Edison bulb collection somewhere else.
You foster animals, prefer public transit, and make your own kombucha.
There’s a lot going on in your life. You’re busy, involved, and consciously committed to making the most of your time here on Earth. You don’t have one hobby, you have twelve, and your decor is reflective of that responsible, all-or-nothing approach to life. With an energy-efficient bulb, of course.
You have a healthy 401K.
This is the lamp of a human being who has her sh*t together. This lamp sees cocktail parties, age-appropriate bedtimes, and the business end of a Swiffer duster on a regular basis. You make dentist appointments. You know your neighbors. You call your mother.
You fancy yourself an amateur designer.
A bit of a think piece, this lamp isn’t for the casual, “I’ll just get it at Ikea” consumer. This lamp sits in your entryway, announcing to all visitors that this is the home of a person with style. A person with taste. A person willing to take the time to individually clean little glass orbs once every quarter. Because you know it’s important. Appearance is everything.
In a home near the ocean, this lamp sits, ready to greet its owner and illuminate her walk from the living room to the kitchen, where a cool container of coconut water waits to refresh and replenish after a morning riding the waves. Cool, calm, confident, this lamp is zen. You are zen.
You’re in possession of several degrees.
A student of life, you chose this lamp for its striking simplicity, it’s clean lines, and its ability to look good in whatever city you’re currently attending classes in. It saw you through your thesis. It watched as you hung your PhD on the wall. It was then moved so people could see the PhD more clearly. It didn’t mind. It knows that you know best. You know everything.
You clean a lot.
Inspired by a recent trip to a five star hotel, you purchased this lamp knowing with certainty it would complete your living room, and quite perfectly cover up a bit of water damage on an otherwise pristine hardwood floor. You look forward to an afternoon spent with this lamp and a bottle of Windex. It calms you.
You own many foreign maps.
You’ll turn this lamp on when you need to pour a glass of very good Scotch at the end of a long, productive day. You’ll relax in a large leather chair and bask in just the right amount of selfie light when no one else is present in the residence. You’ll rely on this lamp’s glow to guide you through pages of recently purchased antique books. You’ll consider this lamp a friend.