How Three Couples Share One Brooklyn Home
What it's really like to live in a commune for a soon-to-be married couple.
Updated Oct 11, 2018 10:22 PM
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Kith visual director Attie James and her partner (soon-to-be-husband) JD have lived together in their Brooklyn Heights six-person commune for two years.
Attie was already dating JD when he moved into the three-bedroom, two-bathroom pre-war brownstone with Aaron—an old friend from Boston—and a couple they knew named Ari and Sean. “It was an unspoken plan for me to move in with them,” Attie says, “I was there when they were unpacking and totally fell in love with the house. I basically just moved my life there from my Upper West Side studio and never looked back.”
For a while, the five friends—two couples and Aaron—lived as a quintet, until he started dating Rachel who moved in soon after.
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“Merging our design aesthetic was easy” says Attie. Luckily, they all share a love of mid-century modern furniture. “We share everything,” says Attie, “except for our individual rooms. If there’s beer in the fridge, it’s for everyone. Everything is fair game—the couches, chairs, TV, tables, utensils, dishes, all of it.”
You would think this hippie-dippie communal style living situation might make it tough for each couple to find the time to be share intimate moments. Not the case. “When JD and I are in our bedroom with the door closed,” says James, “we feel like it’s just the two of us.”
Below, James fills in the blanks of what life is like after, er, on the brink of, “I do” as a sixsome.
by myself,
and I spent most of my time at home
painting and lounging
.
exciting
when I moved in with
JD, Ari, Sean and Aaron
.
art
, I’m all about
brush
. My partner, though, prefers
aerosol
. The most beloved piece of art we own is
a painting (made by) my mothe
r.
The first dinner party we threw together was a
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Sunday evening
. We invited s
ome of our friends in the neighborhood
and
JD (I’m not great in the kitchen)
cooked
shepherd’s pie
. The one thing I regret was
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a photo we took that ended up making the whole dinner look slightly haunted
.
On a typical Monday evening, we can be found
eating Indian food
and
playing with our new kitten Anastasia
. Saturday afternoons are for p
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ainting, art projects and strolling around the neighborhood
and on Sundays we always
are happiest at home watching the Patriots (well, he watches)
.
We mostly shop for furniture on
Craigslist, Ebay and at vintage stores
. The most expensive piece we’ve purchased cost
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$400
and
was a mid-century credenza
which came from
a treacherous storage unit in Long Island City.
Family heirloom(s)?
We have a vintage painting of the Virgin Mary from JD’s grandmother that we adore
.
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The thing I’m most attached to from my single life is
a small white vintage bureau
because
it reminds me of that era of my life
. I bought it from
the Upper West Side flea market with my former roommate and oldest friend
and keep it in
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our living room
.
The five items you will always find in our refrigerator are
seltzer, raspberries, obscure brands of IPA, JD’s week supply of meal prep,
and
left-over Indian food
.
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The five items you will always find in our medicine cabinet are
Rite Aid flossers, Avene thermal water spray, Aesop camellia nut facial hydrating cream, Baxter under eye treatment
, and
Barbasol shaving cream
. I absolutely cannot get in bed at night without using my
rose hip oil
on
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my face
.
The registry item we can’t live without is
two snow peak folding beach chairs
.
Our favorite room in the house is
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the dining room and living room
because
they are the biggest rooms in the apartment and get the most natural light
. We spend a lot of time
making things (mostly indigo dying) while JD watches TV, works and relaxes
in there.
When it comes to housework, I am the one who always
purges unnecessary belongings and organizes
. My partner, on the other hand, insists on
bathroom cleaning and laundry
. The one thing we can’t agree on is
my tendency to want to replace bathroom towels after only five uses
.
The three best organizational tricks I’ve learned are
to build shelves for height, maximize space under the bed, and the ability to live with occasional chaos
.
When it comes to money, our biggest challenge is how to
not have a good time—we have the habit of going out for a drink which turns into oysters, which turns into appetizers, and then steaks, then dessert and more cocktails
. I like to spend on
home items and clothes
, but he/she cares way more about
camping gear, coolers, and his guitar
.
The most important piece of advice I would give to newlyweds is
to always live your truth
. Never, ever compromise when it comes to
comfort!!
In ten years we hope for our home to be
a place people love to come visit
, filled with
tons of plants and family
.
My design aesthetic is three words is
romantic, eclectic, and understated
. My partner’s is
comfortable, traditional, and clean
.
Our most memorable fight at Ikea was about
whether or not JD should post this ugly photo of us cringing in line on Instagram (which he ended up doing)
.
we have an altar of Virgin Marys, family heirlooms and prayer candles that we use as a way of keeping all the important things in our lives close to us
.
See more newlywed homes:
A Bohemian Haven in a Brooklyn Townhouse, Built by Newlyweds How a Creative Couple Combined Their Homes After Marriage What It’s Like to Live on the Road as Newlyweds